Richard Sherman. . . .

I'm late. . . really late. . . I know. After all, it happened almost five days ago. In today's world of speed, obsolescence, and everything from yesterday being "so yesterday," I'm late in the game. I have to confess that I'm late in the game by design. The speed of the world can easily convince us that you need to speak and you need to speak NOW or what you say will be irrelevant. 

I'm learning that wisdom sometimes dictates taking time to ponder your thoughts for a good long time before they emerge into words. I'm a guy who needs to take Proverbs 29:20 to heart far more often than I do: "Do you see a man who speaks in haste? There is more hope for a fool than him." The lesson is this. . . don't say too much. . . and what you do say, don't say it too fast. 

So, five days later I thought I'd share some very brief thoughts on Richard Sherman. . . this week's most famous man in America. I think Richard Sherman is worth talking about. He's put himself out there and now that he's out there, we need to process him with each other and with our kids. So, here are some random thoughts on what happened five days ago, and the man that decided to make it happen. . . 

• We all have "filter problems." Sadly, our culture increasingly tells us that we can run our mouths effectively without filters. That's not a good thing. See Proverbs 29:20 (above). If our filters are non-existent, we should install them. If our filters are worn out or not working, we need to get to the filter store right away. 
• Jesus said that it's out of the overflow of the heart that the mouth speaks. What I say is who I am, whether I like it or not. If I say something that I wish I hadn't of said or that I shouldn't have said. . . well. . . I can't fall back on "Hey, that's not me. That's not who I am." That is me. I am the person who chose the words, made the decision to use the words, etc. What I say might be the best window into who I really am.
• Many bloggers, pundits, and commentators are wondering why such a big deal is being made about Richard Sherman, what he said, and how he said it. Well, fact is, we should expect better of ourselves and others. And if we don't, we should. 
• If I mess up, I need to apologize. I love the advice of Tony Dungy, who always expected the best from his players. When they didn't deliver on that expectation, he told them to man up. . . no excuses, no explanations. That's been good advice that each of us needs to follow. If you do something wrong, apologize. No excuses. No explanations. 
• I've heard numerous folks say that we shouldn't judge the real Richard Sherman by his behavior when he's on the football field. That's one of the most ludicrous statements I've ever heard. We aren't - or at least shouldn't be - compartmentalized beings. We must be consistent, integrated, and trust-worthy. 
• In the wake of Richard Sherman's words, someone posted these words from another player going to the Super Bowl, Peyton Manning. . . words that his father, Archie Manning pounded into him from the time he was young: "It takes 20 years to build a reputation, and five minutes to ruin it." That's good advice for all of us. By the way, "five minutes" is even pretty generous.
• "Hey kids. . . don't ever be like that" are seven words that we as parents need to use on a regular basis. 
• The Puritan Prayer book, The Valley of Vision, contains these words in the prayer entitled "True Religion": "Preserve me from a false estimate of the whole or a part of my character; May I pay regard to my principles as well as my conduct, my motives as well as my actions." That's a prayer we all must pray.

The Difficult Yet Necessary Work of Forgiveness. . . .

There's a theological reality that is inescapable. We know it because the Bible tells us so. It's the reason Jesus came in the first place. The reality is this: We are horribly broken people. But we could come to the same conclusion simply by engaging our senses without the gift of God's written word. We can see, smell, taste, hear, and feel our own brokenness. It's stuck all over us and all through us like glue. And then there are all the other people who come into our lives. Broken. . . all of them. . . just like us.

Time and life have a way of so driving home the reality of our brokenness, that we have to be in a complete state of denial  to not recognize its gnawing ever-presence in our lives. We are broken people who live with, work with, are raised by, equally broken people living in a horribly broken world. And when the broken meets the broken, we find ourselves in situations where the need to forgive and be forgiven are equally present.

The older I've gotten, the more meaningful and haunting are those words our Lord taught us to pray: "Forgive us our sins as we forgive the sins of others." On my trip to Rwanda with Compassion International four years ago, I saw countless first-hand astounding stories of what it means to forgive, as genocide victims and perpetrators were engaging in the costly yet life-giving work of forgiveness. Upon my return, I began to read more and more about forgiveness.

Two weeks ago, I read a book about forgiveness that's one of the best I've ever encountered. . . devoured might actually be a better word. It's a book that actually releases today. And I'm so excited about it's content, spirit, and message that I'm encouraging everyone I know to give it a read. It's Leslie Leyland Fields Forgiving Our Fathers and Mothers: Finding Freedom From Hurt & Hate. 

I first encountered Leslie through her amazing article published a few years ago in Christianity Today magazine. The article - "The Myth of the Perfect Parent" - has remained a favorite for us to pass on to others. So many have it found it to be incredibly freeing. After contacting Leslie, she told me about her book Parenting Is Your Highest Calling, And Eight Other Myths The Trap Us In Worry and Guilt. That too, has become a favorite of ours here at CPYU. What I appreciate about Leslie's writing is her ability to communicate powerful and timely messages that are built on a solid foundation of good, Biblical theology. She is a gifted writer whose writings are a gift to the church. This latest book is no exception.

Forgiving Our Fathers and Mothers, written along with Dr. Jill Hubbard, takes readers into an understanding of God's call to forgive that is not only theologically sound, but extremely personal. Leslie unpacks forgiveness not as a mere exercise in theology, but as one who has had to figure out how to forgive a father who, to many in our culture, might be labeled as unforgivable. This is a very personal book at several levels. You hear Leslie and Dr. Hubbard's own stories. They have lived what they are writing. And because it is personal at that level, readers cannot help but "take this book personally," as God brings to mind the need to forgive. . . not just fathers and mothers. . . but anyone in their lives who is deserving or undeserving.

How important is forgiveness? Leslie writes, "Often we think the cost of forgiving is too high. But we do not consider the cost of not forgiving. We do not see who we're becoming. We're too busy trying to extract our debt that we do not see what it has done to us." True. But do we realize that?

If you've got a pile of books stacked in your "still to be read" queue, add Forgiving Our Fathers and Mothers to the pile. . . and put it at the top.

Good news. . . I've asked our good friend Byron Borger at Hearts and Minds Bookstore if he would be willing to offer and discount Leslie Leyland Fields new book, Forgiving Our Fathers and Mothers. . .  and he said "yes"! To contact Hearts and Minds and order your copy, click here.

A Little Advice. . . To Young, Old, and Me. . .

A car ride with someone I don't really know is one of my favorite things. I realize that may sound a little bit creepy and it goes against one of the most basic of childhood warnings issued by my mother. . . but let me explain.

My travels typically include pick-ups and drop-offs at airports. Those rides can last anywhere from fifteen minutes to three hours (trips to North Dakota!). Getting to chat with my youth worker/chauffeur is always fun. I find out about their lives, their ministries, their families, and some of the unique and interesting stuff flying past us outside the window.

Last week a young youth worker named Scooter drove me from New Orleans Baptist Seminary to the airport so I could catch my flight home. I had already spent some time with Scooter over the course of the previous couple of days and had come to appreciate his energy and enthusiasm related to ministry. On our ride, he was telling me about the neediness of his students and his desire to see them come to know and serve Jesus. The conversation morphed into Scooter sharing his dreams for his youth ministry future along with a request for me to speak out of my experience (I'm almost twice Scooter's age!) with some advice. I treasure, respect, and aspire to that kind of teachability.

My advice was pretty simple. First, embrace your calling and pursue it with humility and excellence. Always be satisfied with where God has you. Our culture (and youth ministry culture) will try to get you to grab for more, but settle where you've been set. And second, continue to work to improve yourself by reading, reading, and reading some more. . . . not just youth ministry stuff, but broad reading of all types. I know that's not necessarily all or the best advice I could give. But at the moment, it seemed like that was the best way for me to encourage my young friend.

Since returning home from that trip I've thought quite a bit about many of the conversations I've been having with young youth workers in recent months. Not all of them have endeavored to be, like Scooter, the best where they're at. Increasingly, I'm sensing the presence of that seductive pull all of us humans face. . . a seductive pull that is amped up in our culture of social media, reality shows, blogging, self-publishing, and all the other tools that allow us to attempt to answer our insecurities with a following. There's a desire to move from where we're at to a place of fame and fortune that we imagine (or believe) will make us complete. While the quest is very real and can become consuming, the target is neither noble or even remotely satisfying. And with us working and living a calling to correctly handle Genesis to Revelation, shouldn't we know and live better?

Earlier this week I ran across these quotes in a post from Maria Popova on the Brain Pickings site. Popova quotes writer John Green, who advises aspiring young writers, “Don’t make stuff because you want to make money — it will never make you enough money. And don’t make stuff because you want to get famous — because you will never feel famous enough,” And then these words from David Foster Wallace: “If you worship money and things … then you will never have enough. Never feel you have enough. It’s the truth.”

These are good reminders for all of us. Sadly, it takes some people until the end of their lifetime to realize just how true these words are. Don't make that mistake. Realize this truth closer to the front end of your lifetime and you will experience the joy of truly understanding and experiencing the blessedness of vocation and calling.

Youth Workers. . . Help Students to Use Their Heads. . . And $1000 For College!

Fifty years ago, Harry Blamires - a student of C.S. Lewis - wrote these seven words at the beginning of his book The Christian Mind: "There is no longer a Christian mind." Blamires was lamenting our growing willingness and inability to think Christianly about all of life. "The Christian mind," wrote Blamires, "is the prerequisite of Christian thinking. And Christian thinking is the prerequisite of Christian action."

Now, fifty years later these words still ring true. . . perhaps even more true. . . as we admit that very few of us and even fewer of our kids know how or even endeavor to think in ways that bring honor and glory to God. How we think and what we think has moved beyond the bounds of discipleship. We allow our minds to be formed, shaped, and filled by "whatever."

When Jesus called us to "come and follow," he was calling us to follow in our totality. . . heart, soul, strength, and  mind. Everything. All that we have, are, and ever hope to be. Head to foot. Inside and outside. Here at CPYU, the purpose of our College Transition Initiative and the work being done by Derek Melleby is all about challenging and equipping students to go beyond the accepted status quo ("whatever") to a more intentional willingness to follow God into college. Leaving for college doesn't have to mean leaving your faith.

In an effort to encourage students to ask good questions about their upcoming college experience, our College Transition Initiative is sponsoring an essay contest for college-bound high school seniors. Students are being invited to submit an 800 - 1350 word essay answering the question, "How will you follow Jesus to college?" Not only is this a great opportunity for students to crystallize their thinking and use their minds to unpack what the next phase of life will look like, but four winning essays will be chosen, with each winner receiving a $1,000 cash prize and a gift certificate to Hearts and Minds Bookstore!

Youth workers. . . I know that you're concerned about the current state of college transition for your Christian students. We've chatted about it over and over. Now, we're inviting you to spur your kids on by encouraging them to think and write strategically about what it means to follow Jesus onto the college campus.

I want to invite you to check out the CTI website and the information on the essay contest. You can also download a pdf of the essay context details here. The deadline for submissions - January 31 - is fast approaching! Get your students thinking and writing now!

God Grant Me A Heart For This Girl. . . And The Heart Of This Girl. . .

Last night I watched the Nightly News on NBC. Once again, from the heated, padded, and peaceful confines of our family room, the screen took us on a two-minute journey into a place where comforts like heat, padding, and peace are largely unknown.

I knew very little about what's going on the Central African Republic until I saw this report. And if my past behavior is any indicator, the initial shock of what I saw on the screen during those two minutes and some-odd seconds will diminish in just short time as I walk to my refrigerator for an evening snack before settling down to catch the first few minutes of the hockey game.

But last night the story about the Central African Republic gripped me in a powerful way. As the story came on the screen and Ann Curry set us up for her piece on the impending genocide and the horrifying story of one eight-year-old girl, I knew that NBC was showing this because we have to see it.

Please take a couple of minutes to watch the clip. I'm not sure I could show the grace this little one is showing. God, grant us hearts for this little girl and all of the Central African Republic. . . and God, grant us heart like the heart of this precious child.

Visit NBCNews.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Trafficking Duck Dynasty. . . What's The Real Message? . . .

I walked into a "Christian" bookstore this morning. . . a big one. And just like every other time when I walk into a "Christian" bookstore, I checked out the layout of the merchandise and the merchandise that populated the layout. There's a method to these retailers' marketing madness. Certain things are put in certain places to catch attention and spark sales. . . . just the like the grocery store. . . where the milk and bread is strategically located in the opposite corner from the store entrance.

I'm convinced that one of the important skills we need to develop is the skill of "reading" layout, location, and the merchandise on the shelves. We need to be present-day men and women of Issachar, who know and understand the times. . . and know what the church (followers of Jesus) should do (I Chronicles 12:32). Which leads me to this. . .

On this morning's bookstore visit I was greeted by an entire rack of Duck Dynasty product. . . duck calls, books, bracelets, devotionals, Miss Kay cookbooks, T-shirts, calendars, DVDs, etc. Yep, front and center. Why? Because we Christians will market anything. . . especially if it's related to our hero/celebrity du jour. And, we Christians are suckers for marketing. We will buy anything and everything related to our hero/celebrity du jour. Yes, as I walked away from that front-and-center display rack I turned around and saw a table loaded with even more Duck Dynasty junk. . . .including bobbleheads, miniature Uncle Si Teacup Keychains ($4.99 a pop!), and a Miss Kay Spatula. Seriously. . . I'm not making this up.

Listen, I'm not setting out here to blast the Robertson family. Instead, I'm scratching my head. . . and I think we should be scratching our heads.  A long time ago my father helped me see that much of what's sold in Christian bookstores is what he called "Jesus Junk." I would go a step further and label much of it "Holy Crap." I wonder if we would pause long enough to step away from our love affair with the fact that for a moment some of our own are front and center in our media-saturated world we would be forced to say "Hey. . . something's just not right here."

For years, the Robertson's have been making duck calls. I'm not a hunter, but I understand that they've done a very good job. Their commitment to fulfilling their calling with vocational excellence gives God great pleasure. But have we facilitated a situation where that calling has been compromised through commitments to mass marketing, brand development, and Christian kitsch?

So. . . here are the questions I'm asking as I endeavor to know, understand, and respond to the times. . .

-Are the Robertson's being trafficked and pimped by the church?
-What does the glut of Duck Dynasty product say about the church?
-What does our excitement about this stuff say about us?
-What does how we spend our money and what we spend it on say about our priorities and our understanding of stewardship?
-What does this stuff, the way we market it, and our fascination with it say to the watching world?
-No offense to Si, Phil, or Miss Kay, but is it possible that we could go deeper in our reading and devotional lives?

Somehow, I think we are and are called to be better than this.

Five Books I Read Last Year. . . That You Should Read in 2014! . . .

I'm convinced that my dad knows a lot because be reads a lot. Over the course of his 82 years (celebrating his 82nd birthday today!) the man has read more books than you can imagine. As a result, he's been a wealth of information. After suffering a stroke almost ten years ago (the kind of stroke that kills most people we were told. . .  and one that left initially left him unable to move or speak), one of the weapons he used to sharpen and improve his mind was reading. While his mobility has decreased since that stroke, his mind remains sharp. Every time I go to visit him he's got a book in his hand.

My dad's commitment to reading along with my years spent with people who love to read and at places where reading and learning is highly valued (Geneva College, Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary, and the Coalition for Christian Outreach), I've committed myself to reading as much as I can. . . which is usually not nearly enough. 

A couple of my reading friends who are always looking for book recommendations typically manage to insert a "What are you reading now?" question into the conversation on a regular basis. That's a great question and one that we should all be asking on a regular basis. But with reading on the decline due to a number of cultural realities, I'm afraid that fewer and fewer of us will even want to know what we should be reading. 

Because I'm not that smart a guy, I know that reading is one avenue I can travel down in an attempt to sharpen my mind and learn about God's world. I read several good books during 2013. For any of you who might want to sharpen your minds and learn more about God's world, here are five recommendations for you to pursue in 2014. . . 

Arrested Adulthood: The Changing Nature of Maturity and Identity, by James Cote. Penned all the way back in 2000, this book's value has increased over time as many of Cote's predictions and analyses have proven true. This book has helped me unpack how adolescence is changing in America. It also serves to bring together an understanding of many of the cultural forces that are converging in a perfect storm that's shaping the young adults you know and love. This one will take some time as you need to stop to ponder and process almost every paragraph. It's a must-read for anyone doing ministry or parenting.

Popcultured: Thinking Christianly About Style, Media, and Entertainment, by Steve Turner. This is the freshest overview of how to approach and engage with pop culture from a Christian perspective that I've read in a long time. Turner is a seasoned rock critic, writer, and thinker from over the pond. . . which makes this book something special. It's going to become a text book for the classes I teach.

Living Into Focus: Choosing What Matters In An Age of Distraction, by Arthur Boers. I listened to Boers speak on this topic at Gordon-Conwell Seminary back in June. I was gripped by his diagnosis, analysis, and prescriptives. As we cross the threshold into full immersion in the Digital Age, this book could be a game-changer for us and for the kids we know and love. It's better than any blood pressure medication on the market.

The Secret Thoughts of An Unlikely Convert: An English Professor's Journey Into Christian Faith, by Rosaria Butterfield. I first heard about Butterfield in a short article in Christianity Today magazine. She was a leftist-lesbian professor who despised Christians. That was timely as I was ready to embark on an ongoing quest to understand as much as I can about homosexuality and a God-glorifying response to those who experience same-sex attraction. All I can say about this multi-layered book is WOW! 

Everyday Prayers: 365 Days to a Gospel-Centered Faith, by Scotty Smith. Ok. . . so 2013 was my second time through this book. . . and I went back to the beginning of this daily prayer companion as we celebrated the start of 2014 yesterday. However, this is one of those books that throws something new at me almost every day. Perhaps it's the way that my groanings, brokenness, and sinfulness parallel those of Scotty. But since I've handed this book on to several dozen friends, I've learned that the book resonates with everyone at a deep level when used to supplement your daily prayer life. In other's words, Scotty's vulnerability makes this book connect with us all.

So there you have it. My list is certainly not exhaustive, but it's a start. Now, let me ask you. . . . what books did you read during 2013 that you would recommend to me?

If you're interested in learning more about reading and good books, be sure to subscribe to Byron Borger's "Book Notes" . . . it's awesome stuff!